Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Randomize