your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Reggie can tackle my bush.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
