We're like a lot better than the average bears
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
The adults are the big ones right?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
