Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
