kristin has been a bad kristin
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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