I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
