She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Randomize
