Sponge bath it is.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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