used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
