I want to have your abortion
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
