we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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