She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Randomize
