Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
