So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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