he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
