So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
