so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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