We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
