This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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