the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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