he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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