so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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