when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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