Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
