Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
