hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Semen is not good for contacts.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Randomize
