CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
