My first STD was from a foam party
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
