We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
