Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
