Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
