another moral hangover. fuck.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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