We won't sleep together?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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