Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
