I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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