he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
