Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
