Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
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