Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
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