People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
