I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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