I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
