I want to walk on stilts...naked
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
