I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
that may or may not have been my penis.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
