It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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