but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
