I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
