Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
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