Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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