hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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