grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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